Gearing up and Powering Down

With age I’ve learned to plan. So planning I must now do, unlike in the days of my more impetuous youth.

The hiking boots were 20 years old with some bad lacing hardware. The tent was family size for sleeping four. Good hiking pants were needed, etc. Finding good replacements was easily accomplished by a trip to the “local” (50 miles round trip) REI.

The more complex and time-consuming part was powering down. The more obvious powering down of all power-sucking electronic devices was easily accomplished. The prior decision to turn off the heat was not met with enthusiasms by my indoor plant buddies, especially the orchid. Thus the heat was left on at 60 degrees. My plant buddies also reminded me that they will still need feeding and Susan agreed to take care of their aqua needs in exchange for more future Johnnydog sitting.

The more complex task was turning off the media monsters as they would have no one to persuade to buy more junk with obnoxious ads, to scare with blown-out-of-proportion tales of murder, to selectively feed “news” to, to call for urgent $ contributions for and against one thing or another, etc. etc. It was to be a time of quiet and peace while I was gone, something I should not have to pay for.

The TV and the Internet were supplied by Comcast cable. One cannot turn off the TV without turning off the Internet and one cannot keep the email address without having Internet services. One also cannot suspend services for more than 3 months unless you’re a snowbird (like summer birds don’t exist?). Thus it was time to cut the cable and business ties with Comcast and save some $s. Hello Gmail!

That left the phone communication which was supplied by Vonage and required an Internet connection for home use. Fortunately, the voice mail feature of Vonage will forward an e-mail to you whenever a voice mail is waiting and one can then retrieve an audio file for listening. No telephone ringing, no need to answer right away. But how do I answer? This is where Skype comes in. This PC application allows me to originate cheap phone calls to anywhere in the world as long as I have high speed Internet access. Thus people cannot reach me directly and I am only able to respond, Internet access permitting. Sounds like a recipe for peace to me. I’ve never been a fan of a real cell phone as it represents to me an electronic leash around my personhood.

Having accomplished all of the above, including cancelling Vonage and changing from paper to electronic payments and banking, I then packed my camping gear, bicycle, and all other needs into my 2004 Prius and managed to embark upon this adventure at 10 AM on April 1. In the rush to leave, I totally forgot to pull an April Fool’s joke on someone.